Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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