HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
