we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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