I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
