She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
