She's JV to your varsity
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
