I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm sobbing to NWA
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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