If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
