i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
