I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize