Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Randomize
