is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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