thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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