Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
