I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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