your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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