I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
