"it" just moved
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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