I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
stop calling my apartment porn island.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
