Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize