so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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