I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
