Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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