Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize