There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Let's get the cat blown out
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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