the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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