like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
