a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Sext me about skeletons
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize