2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
