Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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