If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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