on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Randomize
