Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize