Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
