I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Randomize