The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
