The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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