I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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