True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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