it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
