What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
