I think my fart just growled at me.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
