That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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