i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize
