wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Someone came in the potted fern
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
