Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
My breasts were aching with rage.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
