there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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