is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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