What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
