Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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