Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Randomize
