Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
i need some magic done to my vagina
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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